Chasing the Dream

I distinctly remember a walk I took on a rocky path alongside a lake a few years ago. It was mid-summer and this rocky path at this particular lake is one I am very familiar with. Yet because of the way the stones line the shore, I was unable to look very far in front of me or I would lose my footing. I decided to walk slowly, and paused from time to time to look at the beautiful colors bouncing off the water. I stopped to notice the clouds drifting in the warm breeze and the gulls that squawked mid-flight. Every few steps I would pause and breathe, and give thanks for the beauty that surrounded me and for the joy that I felt.

I knew the spot on the shore I wanted to stop at, so at each pause, I would look ahead and notice where I was, and see how much closer I was getting to the spot on the beach. Each step required me to look at the rocks I was stepping on because some of them were flat and unstable, and a few would slip beneath my feet, so it required me to be steady on my other foot and pay attention to my balance.

It wasn’t long into my walk when I realized that each step I take in my own life is just like taking steps on the rocky path. Isn’t life a rocky path anyway? If I take my time and walk slowly and deliberately, I will notice the beauty and joy that is available to me in every moment. I will have more opportunity to reflect on where I came from and experience gratitude.

For some reason, in that moment in front of the lake, this realization struck me, perhaps not for the first time, but in a more profound way. The act of always “looking ahead” is such a deep part of modern western culture. How many times had I heard things like, “live in the moment” or “enjoy the process” but continued to barrel ahead in my life?

I wondered how many times I had missed intuitive guidance or opportunities because I was so focused on where I was going, rather than how I was getting there and where I was in each moment. I remember asking myself, “How many times during your life do you forget to pay attention to the path you are on, Jane? How many times do you rush ahead, missing out on the journey, only focused on the destination?”

The answer to myself wasn’t surprising: Almost all the time. I’m the type of person who loves planning, dreaming, and thinking of the future. Like many, I’m sure, I have big dreams and I tend to get excited about the outcome—forgetting to focus on the path in front of me, the step I am taking, and what is around me in each moment.

That moment standing on a heap of sun-beaten rocks, helped me become more aware of this aspect of myself. It reminded me that I am always on the path, and always will be on the path! There is no need to rush. As I reach each destination, won’t it be more fulfilling if I enjoy the process along the way? Won’t I feel more stable in my footing if I pay attention to where I’m placing my feet? It doesn’t mean I won’t slip and skin my knee sometimes….but if I pay attention to what is around me, I will be more fulfilled than I would ever be constantly chasing the dream….

Over the past few years I have steadily become more aware of life’s process, and my journey. I have become more willing to stand in the uncertainty and focus on the lessons I am learning, and take in my surroundings. This has helped me to cultivate more gratitude and joy as I live more mindfully. Rather than chasing the future, I have been learning to look to the future, knowing where I may be headed, but not necessarily how it will unfold.

Because if I choose to live a life chasing the dream means I will always be seeking what is “out there”, yet the dream I am living is always right here, in this moment.